Are you the same person you were 4 years ago? I’m certainly not. And for the most part, I would say that’s a good thing. When I first started blogging, I was new to military life, married life, deployment AND I was pregnant. SO much was going on and blogging was the only thing I felt like I could turn to at times. Because as much as I had family and friends who were there for me, it wasn’t always comforting. I don’t mean that in an ungrateful way because I am so thankful I had the people I did when I was going through all of that. But a part of me felt empty without Z there, and blogging helped me deal with that.
I blogged a lot about military life because that’s what was new to me. I was fully submerged in it and loved meeting other military wives. And I still do. I look back on some of those posts from the beginning and have mixed feelings. Some make me proud to see how far I’ve come. Some make me cringe at how whiny and ignorant I was being. Some make me happy and reminiscent about good times. And some make me upset and a pang of sadness comes over me.
But that’s life. That was my life at the time and I’m sure it won’t be the last time I look back and feel embarrassed, sad, or joyful. Which is a good thing.
When Z came home, I learned that there was an entire community of other bloggers. When before I had just been blogging for myself and my sanity, I began to meet other women who shared similar interests. I began reading blog after blog and connecting on so many levels with people all over the world. Military wives, civilian wives, new moms, second time moms, etc. I had been so used to working full-time that this gave me something to do with my time when Bubs was napping. It made me feel apart of something and good about myself.
My blog was all over the place and some may agree that it still is. But I was just going with the flow and writing whatever I wanted to. I was obsessed with being a new mom so there were a lot of posts about mommy stuff. I felt a lot of emotions about military life and wrote heartfelt posts on that. I discovered that I could review products and share my thoughts on different brands. I fell in love with fashion and my own personal style and began to explore that. A whole lot of random, but it was my space. My space to do whatever I wanted with. And most of the time, others came to read it because they supported me in my passion. Or they were curious about my life and our next steps. Or they needed advice and felt I was someone they could turn to.
Those are some of the biggest reasons I love blogging. The connections I have made. There are women I’ve never met who I talk to on a daily basis. Or people I know “in real life” and see once every few months. There are women who don’t comment often but send me emails to thank me for my post on motherhood struggles or anxiety. And that, that is why I love blogging.
Blogging has changed over the years and so have I. I’ve grown up, I’ve matured, and I’ve learned more about myself as a writer, person, wife, mother, friend, daughter, etc. It’s made me analyze things and be thankful. It’s helped me to swallow my pride and apologize when necessary. It’s helped me discover passion and capabilities that I didn’t even know I had. It’s taught me lessons, given me hope, and made me the person I am today.
This place may be a jumbled hot mess
most some days but guess what? So am I. That’s me. That’s life. And that’s real. I’m learning more about myself everyday and I know that I’ll continue to change and grow over time. And in turn, so will this here blog. And I’m okay with that. It’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring, right? 🙂
Why did you start blogging? Has your blog evolved over time?