This week’s question:
Over the years, what did you learn you needed in a significant other? What did you learn about yourself?
Dear Miss Independent,
Cue Kelly Clarkson now. You are your own woman miss, and although sometimes you may lose yourself in a new relationship, your true personality eventually shines through.
You don’t like being told what to do, you don’t like following anyone else’s lead, and you certainly don’t take crap from nobody! (Yes, I know that’s not grammatically correct, it’s from Tommy Boy.)
In high school, you’ll enter your first “serious” relationship. He will actually end up being the only “ex” you could actually stand to be in the same room with after breaking up. He’s a good guy, but just not “the one”. However, you learn here that you need someone to make you laugh. That’s super important to you and it will be one of the foundations for future relationships.
In college, you will date two guys, both for long periods of time. These guys are totally wrong for you and in every way possible. You’ve always had a dominant personality; you’re outspoken, you’re wild, you’re a free spirit, and you know what you want.
These guys will bring out a terrible person in you. You’ll become jealous, you’ll become angry, you’ll become fearful, you’ll become skeptical, you’ll develop trust issues, and you’ll lose all aspects of your individuality.
You’ll distance yourself from friends and you’ll take verbal and mental abuse that you never, ever thought you’d put up with. You’ll think it’s love (with one of them) but will realize when you meet your husband that it wasn’t love at all. It was lust, and the idea of being in love.
It will take you a long time but you will learn that you deserve so much better. You’ll learn that you don’t need to put up with that sort of verbal or mental abuse and that there are nice guys out there.
You are one strong willed and tough chica. You don’t give yourself enough credit and after everything you’ve been through, you still look for the good in others.
You will remember how you felt at the absolute lowest point in your life and you will promise yourself never to feel that way again.
You will learn a lot of lessons the hard way but in the end, you’re the one who will come out on top. You’ll end up with the funniest, kindest, smartest, most handsome man in the entire world, and live a life filled with more love than you ever thought possible.
Being honest is the most important characteristic you can find in another person and as soon as you become honest with yourself, things will start falling into place.
See you soon,
And so that you’re ready for next (and FINAL) week’s question:
Describe your first date with your now current partner. Did you feel any “butterflies” on your first couple of encounters? Did you have any indication it would later be the “real deal?”